A LITTLE SIDETRACKED: into the mind of Kristen this Friday morning…

Dear lovely readers, I am sorry for the delayed post this morning! I’m having a wee bit of an internet issue (for the umpteenth time) and am actually on the phone with my service provider as we speak. But thanks to Windows Live Writer – I’m at least able to get this post prepared for your enjoyment!

With that said, and since I can’t quite get onto the internet for my usual browsing and research session, I’m going to write about, well…writing. More specifically, writing in this wonderful world of Blogdom. Now, it’s only been two weeks – this is my 16th post, to be exact – but over these two weeks I have learned so much, have found so many amazing blogs to follow, and have even gained a few followers of my own (thankyouthankyouthankyou!). It’s so addicting, in fact, that I get sucked into the interwebs for hours upon hours and often lose a good chunk of my day!

But there is also an underlying tension, a competitive edge, and feelings of envy that arise during these marathon browsing sessions. How can I possibly compete with all the incredibly crafty, comical, and personable blogs out there? Blogs that have been around for years, blogs that have thousands of followers, and blogs that are so well written and so well designed that I just want to scream with a mixture of sheer delight and jealousy. How do they do it?! And where do I fit in…?

This is where I begin to doubt myself. Why in the world (wide web) would anyone want to read my blog? What do I bring to the table that hasn’t already been brought (“It’s already been broughten!”)? I’m sure other bloggers have this very same fear: I often feel like I’m losing my voice amidst the millions of other voices out there. Not only am I getting buried, but I actually begin to lose my point of view, and “my voice” begins to sound like someone else’s. I begin writing differently, to fit the mold of what I think other people want to hear or see, just to gain more followers. And so the competition begins…

Frankly, sometimes I feel like I’m beginning to lose my self – the whole point of starting this blog was to be true to myself and hopefully inspire others along the way!

So, I have to remind myself over and over that this blog is nothing more than a teeny tiny baby in this big, scary world wide web. It has to be coddled, it has to be nurtured, and in time, perhaps…..it will grow. And if it doesn’t – who really cares? This blog is wholly mine; it is a place to collect my thoughts, it is my creative outlet, it is my source of inspiration, and it is an excuse for me to explore the inspiration of others – I get to browse through beautiful images, read amazing content, and consistently learn something new. I’m fortunate enough to simply have this outlet, and to have the time to nurture it. I can only be so lucky to have others that I can share this with, whether it be 5, 500, or 5000.

So, with all that said, I must thank my readers – the few and the many – for inspiring me to be true to myself. Yes, I need to consistently remind myself that I do write for myself, but I can’t help but realize that my inspiration comes from sharing this with you.


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